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They’re so sweet at our bank. Every time I go through the drive-thru with the kids and dog, they pass back a sucker for each kid and a milk bone for the dog with my deposit slip. Man, my kids and dog LOVE to go to the bank. I, however, am starting to feel neglected because not one single time have they passed back a treat for mom. And who needs a treat more than mom?
Here are 10 things my bank can pass back to me with my deposit slip that will help them keep my business.
2. A Ghiradelli chocolate square (or two)
3. A coupon for a free hour of babysitting (to be redeemed right after the kids finish the candy you gave them)
4. A lottery ticket
5. Some weed. (KIDDING!)
6. Coupon for free glass of wine. I’ll just save these up until I can get the whole bottle.
7. A photo of David Beckham in his underwear. Try to stop yourself from clicking on that photo.
8. An extra $20.00. I’m sure your boss won’t notice.
9. Fortune cookie. Fortune should say “Your eyes are so beautiful I didn’t even notice those dark circles underneath” or “David Beckham will show up at your house tonight.” Yes, I know to add IN YOUR DREAMS to the end of each fortune, bitch.
10. A bag of takeout so I don’t have to cook dinner. Bonus points if you haven’t eaten any of it first.
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