Real Moms Drink Toulouse and Tonic
In case you haven’t heard, I moved from Atlanta back to my hometown of Mobile, Alabama almost 2 years ago. I just HATE <sarcasm font> being back here as anyone who asks me how I like being a Mobilian again can testify.
And now my blog has been voted Best Local Blog or Website in our awesome alternative weekly’s (The Lagniappe) Nappie Awards. And boy does it SUCK. It sucks so hard I thought I’d make a list about how sucky it is.
So here, in no particular order, are 5 reasons why winning a Nappie Award sucks.
5. You do not get a crown. I don’t care if all I win is the door prize at a PTA function – I expect it to come with a big ass Toddlers and Tiaras Grand Supreme-style crown — or I’ll just have to show up wearing my own (everyone should own at least one crown).
4. Having to listen to people congratulate you all the time is just plain annoying. I mean, blah blah blah blah, move along. Wait, could you just say that one more time first? And if you want to add, “Your blog is really really funny,” I’ll try not to roll my eyes.
3. The word “nappy” is not really supposed to be a compliment is it? Now people are going to call me a nappy mom and what am I supposed to say to that? “Thank you????” Yes, probably.
2. Now I have to go ON STAGE during the Nappie ceremony to get my award (which will probably be a prize bag with a vibrator in it) in front of a bunch of drunk people – and I will have to be drunk myself – and if you want to know how I feel about drunk people and getting drunk myself, well a person who named her blog after a drink is bound to just HATE that. And then, SIGH, I have to go to a party afterwards where I will be forced to CELEBRATE with a bunch of happy people. And that is why getting an award sucks.
1. Let’s be honest, winning a Nappie Award only sucks in that it can’t be relived every single day of the year. Thank you so much to every one of you who voted for me and thanks to the Lagniappe for being my favorite local read, for entertaining, informing and making me laugh. And congratulations to all the other winners. I can’t wait to feel your speculums, sample your burgers and get my hair did by you.
If you’re here because of the Nappie Awards, here’s what I recommend. First, subscribe so you’ll get new posts from this (hilarious if I do say so myself) blog in your inbox. It’s just 1 or 2 per week usually. Then like my page on Facebook and join the conversation about being a real mom in the real world. Warning: if you’re perfect or oh-so-serious, it’s probably not the page for you. Cuz we spend a lot of time laughing at our imperfections.
Next, check out this page to read my most popular posts. It’s a great place to start.
Finally, if you’re coming to the Nappie Awards Friday night and you’d like to win a signed copy of one of my best-selling books, find me and answer this question:
What’s your favorite Honest Wine Label For Moms and WHY?
The first 2 people will win!
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Congrats!! So happy for you!
Wow you have been blogging. When I tap in it shows the 12 wine label story so I didn’t scroll down. Heads up 😉 Good to see you again.
Those two boys have got to be the coolest, cutest, smartest, and mostly importantly ..kindness boys ever (with the exception of my son!)
Too funny!! Congratulations! How is it i’m just now finding your blog? I’m a working mom to four boys ages 10-5. I found you from the Boy mom in the girls department. That is my life. BTW: I think the honest wine label “LICE” is my favorite with a close second to “I may have had one kit too many.”