Just in time for your summer “lock yourself in the bathroom” reading time comes the next in the New York Times Best-Selling series, “I Just Want To Be Perfect.” 37 stories about trying to be perfect as wives, mothers, women, people…and failing miserably. Thank goodness there’s so much laughter in the failing. Especially for you.
I have to say, I’ve failed a lot and in a lot of different ways. I was once invited to dance on stage with Vince Neil while he sang “Girls, Girls, Girls” and apparently didn’t do it in the way he wanted so he pushed me out of his spotlight. I once wore a new shirt around throughout an entire day with the round “XS” tag on my right boob, and NO ONE SAID ANYTHING to me. I figured it out by looking in the mirror while brushing my teeth to go to bed. I’ve failed MISERABLY at being a perfect mother – so miserably in fact that I started a whole blog about it. I did a BUNCH of stupid stuff as a single girl – so stupid that I wrote an entire blog post full of advice for my niece in the hopes she could learn from my many, many, many mistakes. I could go on and on about my failures but the one in the book is a bit more (as my 8yo would say) epic.
The book has just been released today on amazon in paperback and kindle.
So what’s the book about? Well, here’s a snippet from the press release:
The cult of perfection is a thing. As women, we are constantly inundated with “helpful” and/or “ah-may-zing” tips to improve our looks, please our men, raise the next Einstein (in a wheat-free, dairy-free, and sugar-free environment), and feng shui the crap out of our homes. Whether it’s the hot new diet that involves only eating what you can forage from the floor of your minivan, bleaching everything from your hair to your teeth to your butt hole, or clearing your clutter by mindfully thanking your ratty underwear for its long, dedicated service before you toss them, we’ve all tried something to be more perfect. We all try strive for perfection and balance in our lives, and most of us fail—spectacularly. These are those stories.
I’m proud to be one of the failures in this book. Ahhh, well, you know what I mean.
My story is about trying to be a perfect wife. I mean, I waited a LONG time to be a wife at all, and once I became one, the circumstances just happened to put me in a position to have too much time on my hands, which had never happened before – so I might have overdone it a bit and failed in an extremely excruciating way at the Pizza Party from Hell. It’s a real, true story I’ve waited 10 years to tell – and if the other people involved in it read it, well, let’s just say one of them is in for a surprise.
You know you want to read about that juicy stuff so get yours now on amazon in paperback or kindle.
If you’ve somehow missed the other 3 books in this marvelous series, find links to them all on my BUY MY BOOK page.
Here is a list of the other marvelous “failures” in the book:
Jen Mann – People I Want to Punch in the Throat / I Just Want to Pee Alone
Bethany Kriger Thies – Bad Parenting Moments
Deva Nicole Dalporto – MyLifeSuckers
Julianna Wesby Miner – Rants From Mommyland
LOLA LOLITA – SammichesPsychMeds / MockMom
Kim Bongiorno – Let Me Start By Saying
Alyson Herzig – The Shitastrophy
Kathryn Leehane – Foxy Wine Pocket
Harmony Hobbs – Modern Mommy Madness
Erin Dwyer Dymowski – Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms
Tara Wood – Love Morning Wood
Kelcey Kintner – The Mama Bird Diaries
Lisa René LeClair – Sassypiehole
Joelle Wisler – Joelle Wisler, Writer
Christine McDevitt Burke – Keeper of The Fruit Loops
Meredith Spidel – The Mom of the Year
Meredith Gordon – Bad Sandy
Nicole Leigh Shaw – NicoleLeighShaw.com
Allison Hart – Motherhood, WTF?
Jennifer Lizza – Outsmarted Mommy
Suzanne Fleet – Toulouse and Tonic
AK Turner – Vagabonding with Kids
Robyn Welling – Hollow Tree Ventures
Ashley Fuchs – The Malleable Mom
Kim Forde – The Fordeville Diaries
E.R. Catalano – Zoe vs. the Universe
Chrissy Woj – Quirky Chrissy
Stacey Gill – One Funny Motha
Wendi Aarons – wendiaarons.com
Jen Simon – jensimonwriter.com
Janel Mills – 649.133: Girls, the Care and Maintenance Of.
Jessica Azar – Herd Management
Susanne Kerns –The Dusty Parachute
Audrey Hayworth – Sass Mouth
Hedia Anvar – Gunmetal Geisha
Christine Organ – christineorgan.com
Shya Gibbons – ShyaGibbons
This is me and my family NOT falling out of a tree so there’s one failure I can really say thanks for. The great thing is you can connect with me without climbing up in a tree. Subscribe and I promise no spam. I hate spam – the canned kind and the internet kind. You can also play along on Facebook here.
Photo by Kim at Nostalgia Studio.
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