Win school supplies and gift cards from #BoogieWipes!

It’s time to head back to school, and I’m teaming up with Boogie Wipes to offer an awesome Back-to-School Giveaway for kids and moms!

Back-to-School giveaway from Boogie Wipes. Three winners will win a backpack and mommy clutch - full of school supplies, gift cards and Boogie Wipes. Ends August 22. Enter now!

Three lucky winners will receive a backpack stocked with school supplies (and Boogie Wipes) and a Mommy Clutch – full of everything moms needs (including gift cards!) [Read more...]

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I Just Want To Pee Alone. Don’t You?

Asher.bookToday is the realization of a lifelong dream for me.  Over the weekend, just a little earlier than I was expecting, I was published.  In a real book.  That you can buy.  And that I can, like, autograph.  If anyone wants.  (looksdownkicksrocks)

And in 48 hours, that book — I Just Want To Pee Alone — went to (on amazon)

#1 Hot New Releases: HUMOR


#1 Hot New Releases: HUMOR ESSAYS

Sooo, why would YOU want this book, you say?

4e26b8f0b76f22bc81623375dbd772b4Let me break it down for you.

I Just Want To Pee Alone is a hilarious collection of original (never before published) essays from 37 of the funniest and most popular mom bloggers on the internet.  All about the funny side of parenting.

You know motherhood is the toughest – and funniest – job you’ll ever love. Raising kids is hard work. The pay sucks, your boss is a tyrant, and the working conditions are pitiful – you can’t even take a bathroom break without being interrupted with another outrageous demand, right?

This book is a must-have for every mother in your life featuring all of these side-splittingly funny bloggers:

People I Want to Punch in the Throat
Insane in the Mom Brain
The Divine Secrets of a Domestic Diva
Baby Sideburns
Rants From Mommyland
You Know it Happens at Your House Too
The Underachiever’s Guide to Being a Domestic Goddess
My Life and Kids
Bad Parenting Moments
Let Me Start By Saying
Frugalista Blog
Suburban Snapshots
Ninja Mom
Four Plus an Angel
Honest Mom
Binkies and Briefcases
Naps Happen
Kelley’s Break Room
Toulouse & Tonic
Hollow Tree Ventures
The Fordeville Diaries
Mom’s New Stage
Nurse Mommy Laughs
The Dose of Reality
The Mom of the Year
Life on Peanut Layne
Cloudy, With a Chance of Wine
Confessions of a Cornfed Girl
I Love Them Most When They’re Sleeping
Random Handprints
You’re My Favorite Today

Final IJWTPA cover

So how can you get the book, you ask?

I got ya covered.

To order a paperback copy of the book with a personalized message and my signature, click the button below for paypal.  Indicate how you’d like the book inscribed (name and/or message) in the “inscribe the book” field.  And btw, you’re AWESOME!

Inscribe the book:

The price ($13.98) includes shipping for one book, which I’ll send out as quickly as possible via U.S. Mail with a 5-10 business day delivery. If you’d like to order more than one copy (WOW, YOU’RE AMAZINGLY AWESOME), email me ( with the details so we can figure out shipping.  Paypal’s not so good at figuring out shipping for more than one book so I can create you a personal invoice if you want several.  And did I mention, you’re AWESOMESAUCE?

For INTERNATIONAL ORDERS:  Please email me directly for costs and shipping fees at

OR buy it on AMAZON in paperback by clicking here.

Or buy it on AMAZON on Kindle by clicking here.

BTW, I wouldn’t hate ya if you wanted to click through from amazon from my site anytime you need to buy something.  It costs you exactly the same as if you’d gone there directly, but I can make some pennies on whatever you buy (you don’t even have to buy whatever item you clicked on from my site…just click through from it and load up that cart).  Girl needs to start making some pennies round here and I KNOW you buy a bunch of amazon shiz if you’re anything like me.

But back on subject.  You can also buy it at  iTunes where it’s currently #2 in Top Humor Sold, right next to Tina Fricking Fey.63214_253414091461501_1880949382_n

NOOK – Barnes and Noble:  Coming soon.

If you have any questions at all, please email me at

Obviously, I hope you buy the book and enjoy it.  If you do like it, I would really appreciate it if you could go back to where you bought it and leave a review.  I wouldn’t hate ya if you mentioned me, hint hint.  Reviews help so much!

Please tell one friend about this book — someone who likes to laugh.  I promise you, they won’t be disappointed.  Just one more person buying the book would make my day.

I can’t thank you enough for your support.  This book is a lifelong dream come true for me and it wouldn’t have happened without your support.  I hope you buy it, read it and then ask me for more!  Thank you, thank you, thank you!

winbooksgraphicNow, would you like to win a signed copy of IJWTPA?  I have 3 beautiful brand new shiny books, just waiting for your name and my signature.  Just click on the rafflecopter link below to enter.  (Don’t worry, they don’t keep your info.  It goes into this raffle and then it’s gone).  Giveaway ends 3/18/12 at midnight.  I’ll contact winners by email and find out what scurvy message you want inscribed on your book, you dirty perv.
a Rafflecopter giveaway

Thank you so much and happy reading.  Walk away now.  Seriously.  I’m about to launch into a hideous ugly cry and I don’t want you to see me like this!

All my love!

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The Best And Worst Thing About Chrismukkah (and win a FURBY!)

The best thing about Chrismukkah and the worst thing about Chrismukkah?

One word.  Two perspectives.

Kid:  The best thing about Chrismukkah is the presents.  So many presents!

Parent:  The worst thing about Chrismukkah is the presents.  So many presents!

This is one aspect of combining Christmas and Hannukah that we haven’t figured out how to manage in a reasonable way.

Between 2 kids, 8 nights of Hannukah AND Christmas morning, I’m going bananas trying to keep up with the demand and our credit card is smoking.

No matter how long or short your holiday celebration is, I bet you’re overwhelmed with gift-buying too.

So let me help a little.

Today, I’m giving away a cute white Furby courtesy of  Wouldn’t this little guy look just adorbs in the arms of a kid you love?


This little cutie retails for $59.99 but one winner will walk away with him/her/it for free.  A winner will be chosen by random drawing on Sunday and Centsless Deals will ship to the prizewinner on Monday so you’ll have your new pet in time for Christmas. Entries open to citizens of the US only.

To enter, just click on the rafflecopter the form below.  Entries close at midnight on December 16 and the winner will be contacted by email.  Don’t worry, your info won’t be shared with anyone.

For more chances to win a furby or a figit, visit There’s More Where That Came From and Four Plus An Angel.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

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Tis The Season (& A Giveaway!)

This is the week that I realized the holidays are already upon us.  Yep, that’s right.  My life is so crazy I had no idea Thanksgiving was next week until my MIL called me to ask me what I dish I was making this year.

My husband has a crazy large (I just realized that could be read as crazy, large instead of crazy-large…I’m gonna leave it open to interpretation) extended family and Thanksgiving is the biggest event of the year around his parents’ house. His mom is also incredibly obsessive-compulsive organized so the menu is very thought-out and no duplicate dishes are allowed.

Today, I thought I’d share the story of the first Thanksgiving I contributed something to the meal.

Now I can make some pretty good classic Thanksgiving dishes but all the usual things, green bean casserole, sweet potato casserole, stuffing, mac and cheese, were all taken. It turned out no one was making bread.

I decided to show off by making a friend’s homemade yeast rolls.

I bought all the ingredients, showed up at their house the night before, dumped the stuff on the counter and headed out for the night with Gabe (my then boyfriend).

Something you might need to know about me to understand where the story goes from here…I can get a little carried away sometimes.

This was one of those times.

I drank a lot.

Then I drank some more.

And maybe one more on top just for good measure.

I may have had just one more on top of that one.

I came back to my future in-laws house and passed out.

The next morning, when it was time to start the long and complicated process of making bread from scratch, I was how shall we say?  Completely and absolutely nonfunctional.

While I laid in the bed, pressing my fingers against my temples and moaning all morning long, Gabe and his sister followed steps 1 to 547, many of which had to be spaced out an hour or more for things like letting the yeast do its job.

My head pounded and my ears rang, and I was steadily cussed in the kitchen below.

I finally dragged myself out of bed just in time to have a Bloody Mary (yes, I did) and eat the beautiful meal other people who were not ridiculously hungover had prepared.

It was a fantastic way to present myself to his entire family for the first time.

And to this day, some of them still mention how much they loved “my” rolls.

Those went bye-bye the next year (waaaay too much trouble — for someone) and I still haven’t found my niche.

But things are looking up for this year. I finally got my hands on the macaroni and cheese.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

If you’re like me, as soon as you push away from the Thanksgiving table, you’ll start to feel the pressure of Christmas shopping.

I can help you with that.

I just read a fantastic, laugh-out-loud book about all the aspects of the holidays that are kinda ridiculous. It’s by Jen of the popular blog People I Want To Punch In The Throat. My favorite parts are about those ridiculous #humblebrag letters everyone sends out and how awkward you feel when Christmas Carolers come to your door.

I want you to go into the holiday season armed with something to make you laugh through the dysfunction.

You can enter to WIN an autographed copy of the book Spending the Holidays With People I Want to Punch In Throat below, but because I know it’s also the perfect gift for everyone on your list, you can also buy it from by clicking here.  Hint:  it’s a super-affordable gift.

But now (drum roll please), it’s time for a GIVEAWAY.  A big one.

Guess what?

Nineteen of your favorite mom humor bloggers had a meeting and we all agreed. There’s a brand new book that we think you NEED to read this holiday season. The title says it all.

Spending The Holidays With People I Want To Punch In The Throat is a heartwarming (yes, really!) collection of hilarious holiday-themed personal stories and observations written by none other than Jen of the well-known blog People I Want To Punch In The Throat.

If the holidays have you stressing about gift giving, cookie decorating, or where in the world to put your Elf on the Shelf, then you need to take a mommy time out and read a chapter or two.

And now you can have a chance to peruse the pages for free. Consider it our holiday gift to you. We are teaming up to give away 19 copies of the book. All you have to do is enter the giveaway using the Rafflecopter form below for your chance to win an AUTOGRAPHED copy!

We promise that it is both endearing and hilarious.

So now you want your own copy right? Well, Jen generously donated an autographed copy to every blogger participating in this giveaway so that we could increase your chances to win. You can enter using the Rafflecopter below. This giveaway is open to US residents only and closes at 12:01am on November 21, 2012.

“But wait, that’s not all!” we say in our best Price is Right announcer voice. We couldn’t get a bunch of tech-savvy moms together for a book giveaway and not bring you an eReader, right? So we are also giving away a Kindle Fire!


NINETEEN winners will receive a copy of Spending The Holidays With People I Want To Punch In The Throat and ONE lucky Grand Prize winner will receive a Kindle Fire! What are you waiting for? Get clicking!


Contest closes at 12:01am ET on November 21. You must leave a valid email address or use a valid Facebook profile so I can contact you to get your mailing address. Winners will be randomly picked via Rafflecopter. If you win, you must get back to me by midnight ET on 11/21 with your mailing address or I will pick another winner. Sorry, only 48-contingent-states USA residents can enter this contest. Void where prohibited by law.

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