I’m not sure what happens to a man’s listening skills between the time you’re dating and the time you’ve been married for a few years but I know that my hubs used to listen to me closely when we were dating and then intentionally repeat things I’d said back to me randomly weeks later just to prove it.

Things are, ahem, a little different now.

I say things 1001 times and still — DOES NOT COMPUTE.

Lately, I’ve resorted to making signs because I’m so tired of repeating myself.

The things I used to talk about were probably a lot more interesting than the things I talk about now.

Then:  Cool new music

Now:  Cool new kitchen appliances like DISHWASHERS and how they work.  i.e. they DO NOT WORK when you put a bowl over the top water-spout.  Didn’t work the first time you did it, still not working the 20th.

Then:  Our feelings for each other.

Now:  The feelings I have when I use my very limited time to organize something and he can’t put it back where it goes, even though I’ve asked repeatedly and even explained the “organizational system” to him at his insistence.

This is the sign I made around the 10th time he took some Excedrin and didn’t put it back with the other pain relievers.

And this is around the 30th time.

Then:  Who, among our friends, got the drunkest last night, fell down, stole somebody’s pants, cheated with somebody else’s girl/boyfriend, wrote a song that was awesome or sucked, called someone a bitch to their face or broke up with that girl/boyfriend that was never gonna last anyway.

Now:  Who, among our household, likes to drink cold water out of water bottles then leave them by the sink for apparent “water bottle elves” to refill instead of refilling them himself.

Then:  The things we wanted to do to each other.  (Sorry mom and dad).

Now:  The things I want to do to him when he makes one of his signature long-cooking dishes, the pot gets major crud burnt onto it and is left in our sink to grow new strains of fungus not yet known to man for 10 days to 2 weeks.

Then:  Where our relationship was going.

Now:  Where all the random stuff that’s left out in the house is going, i.e. into places where no one can find it anymore, one of which is “my” drawer in our entryway table.  My drawer is on the left, his is on the right.  When our 5-year-old can’t find anything at all, he says, “Daddy put it somewhere and we can’t find it everywhere.”

Then:  Our shared passion for books, writing and creativity.

Now:  His passion for throwing away honey-do lists and my passion for recreating them.

Those are the 8 “signs” your husband might be annoying you around the house.

It could quickly turn into 10 signs.  Just check back with me this afternoon.


Follow @toulousentonic


Here’s a sign I made just for you!  Click it now!